ON BEING A GIRL

The scars i got,
On my face and my neck,
On my hands and my legs. 
Not because I was ignoble,
But because of you and your deeds.
The hideous touch and the humiliations!
Sometimes for my dusky complexion,
Sometimes for my features and my looks!
You took me as a toy,
Lifeless and emotionless!
For a sake of enjoyment and pleasure.
You dressed me and undressed, 
You abused and left.
You said I was a slut,
When I opposed the things you did.
You left me with those scars,
That broke me from inside. 
Every possible thing I tried,
To collect the part of me,
That was scattered in a crowd.
In the heaviest downpour,
I stood.
In the hottest summer,
I was wrapped in a 'sheet'.
To keep myself away,
From getting the 'human heat'.
Firing on me,
Severals of question,
Doubting my character,
My resolves and me!
Scars were for I was a girl,
Humble and meek!
You treated me as a weakling,
You never knew,
I too had armour and headgear,
But i thought,
The man and its kind,
To be hearty and dear!
I was a soul,
With many identity.
As I was a daughter and a child,
A sister,full of innocence,
A mother full of love and motivation,
A  grandmother, full of care and affection!
Thinking myself as ,
A reflection of every beautiful soul!
Oh!! Silly me,
In this world of hatred and inequality,
How can I expect anyone to be,
Demure and kind.
Helpful and understanding,
With a lovely mind!
I know the scars will remain there forever,
And it ought to be,
So that when after an age,
I'll get  strong,
Very strong I mean.
I'll say,
See! These are the scars you gave,
At times, I did cry because of it,
I know.
For I couldn't believe,
Cruelity of man,this way!
But today on the apex where i stand is,
Because of those ugly scars you gave.
It gave me power and strength,
Fortitude and endurance!
It made me realize,
Who I am and where I belong.
It taught me to be and act strong.
Today,standing at a height,
From where I can fly,
I can shout and I can keep my voice.
And you will have to hear.
After hearing me at the top of my voice,
You'll come  to apologize,
Dont worry!
I won't punish you for the past,
Or even make you feel small.
For I am a lady,I'll forgive you,
I have a heart,
I am not merciless and heartless like you!!!

'DEFECTS' OF A MAN

Yes!He is blind,
Neither he can see the restlessness,
In those eyes,
Nor the numbness,
In their life.
World is getting into vicious work,
But he is contented and free,
Thinking,He is resting under,
The shade of the safest tree!
Yes!He is deaf,
For He ignores those painful cries,
That hit him every night.
Treating them unknown,
Treating them as lies.
He moves ahead,thinking,
They are not of those whom he loves,
Or even of those for whom he cares.
Yes he is dumb!
For he never speaks,
Even if he witness,
Something untrue,something unfair.
He is happy being zipped,
Living his life on his own wish.
With self satisfaction,all for himself,
Without tensions,without worries!
Yes! He is lame,
He may run,
But never walk,
On the path that lead to,
Justice and equality.
All because he is well off,
He has all of his need,
All of his greed!
So having eyes never mean,
One can hear.
Ears never define,
One may hear.
Mouth is useless if,
One can't speak or stand for fair.
Rusted legs are those,
Which moves without wisdom,
On the way that has lost,
All its beauty,All its glory,
And all its goodness!

A LOST FRIEND

I still remember the day,
We had a falling out.
I never thought it would happen,
And it was never supposed to be.
Still i thought,
It would heal up with time.
But i was wrong,
Things got worse with time.
You were no longer the best thing,
That once happened to me.
I could see the innocence,
Fading away from your eyes.
You were no longer true,
Just a story full of lies.
An unspoken hatred was spread,
No care,No affection was left.
Sometimes i was deep down into pain,
Missing your endearing acts,
Missing those walk we made,
Together on rugged lanes.
But i knew you were changed,
You were someone else,
Someone unknown,someone strange.
Perhaps in your life, I was a thorn,
Or stood nowhere,
In the list of people you adored.
But for me you were,
My strength, My passion,
My enthusiam,My only motivation.
You had a place in my heart,
A very reserved one.
Today,when you are gone,
I can't bring you back,
And I don't want to even.
Because now you are just a body,
A gaudy one!
Neither you have those positive vibration,
Nor you are my inspiration.
I was waiting for my friend,
The person whose shadow,
I loved to follow.
I am left with no affection,
For the fake one.
Whenever i miss my sweet little buddy,
To my memory,he comes as,
A LOST FRIEND OF ME!!

THOSE BEAUTIFUL DAYS

One day,
At the crack of dawn.
I was sitting and thinking upon,
Those sweet memories,
Now which were all beyond recall.
Those scoldings,those teachings,
Those punishments,those teasings.
Those beautiful days,
Were my life's best phase!

Life was all above,
Betray and perfidy and diplomacy.
Without hatred,without jealously.
Those beautiful days,
Were my life's best phase!

There was innocence in every eye,
Things were done with honesty,
Without dirty tricks and ugly lies.
No feeling of getting high,
By crushing other's happiness,
Or making delicate hearts cry.
Those beautiful days,
Were my life's best phase!

There was a feeling of,
Brotherhood and love.
People cared not to hurt,
Heart was valued more than mind.
Those beautiful days,
Were my life's best phase!

No casteism,no discrimination,
No individualism,no groupism,
Everyone was treated as one.
Life was free from pains,
No strategies,no hidden games.
Those beautiful days,
Were my life's best phase!

MIDNIGHT CHILDREN

In the midst of the 'roar',
Lies the cries of needy,
But dazzling nights,
Cashed up's parties,
Dance and music and lights,
Distracts us from knowing,
The difference between the smile.
Smile of a rich and a poor,
A smile that mark it off from each other.
A Smile with happiness,
Or a smile with a hidden fear.
Lost in mellifluous songs,
We ignore the voice,
Voice of someone standing near.
Not for bread or tea,
But for few words of sympathy.
Everynight,
When the highway is left in silence,
There flies a thousands of dreams,
Dreams of those children,
For whom dreams are better than reality.
In which they dance,
Like the multimillinaires!
They make skyscrapers,
Buses and cars and planes and ships.
From the early morning,
They long for night,
Sweet,Full of imaginations,
That is beautiful and bright!!!

THE CORPSE AND THE COURTYARD

The corpse and the courtyard,
The place where once laughter was heard,
Today it is only the place where,
Rejection and dismay is spread.
Everyone is blank with cowed eyes,
A heavy heart and devoid mind.
Perplexed with fright,
Tangled with questions like,
Why and how.
Regretion is there,
Regretion of loosing someone close,
Someone dear.
Life without him is colourless,
Numb and indifferent.
The sky is filled with berethful cries,
There are several questions,
To be answered,
Without prejudice,without lies.
Ocean of sorrows and pain is, 
Everywhere felt and seen.
It seems as if,
Smile is snatched from its'nest',
Sensations are thrown out of,
Skin and hand.
Everyone near the corpse is,
Cold and lifeless,
Motions are made,
But they are all feeling less.
Time is passing by,
Happiness is left behind and lost,
Only sadness is filled within.
Nothing did change for the rest,
But for them life is like,
Sun is felt with no warmth,
Moon seems dull and ugly,
It has no longer,
The power to heal the wounds,
Or make life peaceful and calm.
One day,
Pains will wear off,
Unseen scars will get lighter,
And things will settle for sure.
But even though,
Those past memories,
Those daunting stories,
Will always come to the way,
Before the start of every new day!!!

DOOR TO HEAVEN

Far and wide,there was no one,
To listen to my grief,
No one to console me.
I was filled with pain,
Something portentous within.
Everytime i looked at myself,
Could just think of my bier.
For the sins I committed,
For all those selfish acts,
For all my avarice and countless lies.
Partially alive, thinking of heaven and abyss,
With a little cognizance of what it meant or was,
Suddenly two shadows, Black and White,
Stood on both my side.
White one talked of salvation,
Other demanded destruction.
They asked 'choose one',
In dilemma I was uptight,
And closed my eyes.
Patiently listened to my conscience,
It whispered WALK ON THE RIGHT PATH'.
And my hands begged for attonment,
My heart and my mind and my soul,
Needed salvation.
I walked towards the white,
He smiled and took me to a beautiful 'site'.
A place full of goodness,
With the smell of happiness,
And a feeling of selflessness.
He said it was heaven,
Unbelievable!!Was it the place!
I dreamt of when I was ELEVEN!!!

MY FREEDOM

For me freedom is,
Walking alone through the lonely  street,
Without any fear of being raped or killed.
For me freedom is,
Wearing the dress of my wish.
No matter what the length is,
It is an inch or 'four',
Above my knees.
For me freedom is,
Living on my own terms,
Not on those stern or unfair ones.
For me freedom is,
Being treated as important,
As i deserve to be.
For me freedom is,
Being heard without discrimination,
Being answered without lust or temptation.
For me freedom is,
Not being suspected,
If i return late,
For I am not a'whore'.
But sometimes i too feel,
Sitting under the sky near the shore.
For me freedom is,
Being believed,being trusted,
During my hardest phase.
When there will be,
Thousand to prove to wrong,
Thousand to put me down.
For me freedom is,
To be in'lime light',
Not just because of my 'eyes or lips',
But because of my ,
Qualities and good deeds!!

LAST CIGARETTE

For times I bemoaned,
But couldn't resist,
The temptation to light the 'flame'.
For me it was like,
Fighting a hunger game.
With the falling ashes i felt,
I was getting into it.
It was not my wish,
Situation made it my need.
With the first very try,
I never realized,
It was making me ruthless,
Making me weak deep inside.
During the start,
I went 'scarlet with joy'.
I was feeling high,
Giving a different,
And an unusual try.
But today when i saw myself,
On the primrose path,
They were all hollow promises i made,
Thinking i would give up,
Lighting the one and only the last.
I know how stupid i have been,
Making lame excuses,
Not to others but to me.
Now i am devoid of warmth and feeling,
And drifting away from,
The originality of me.
Enough now!
I am sick,
Sick of what i did.
Now its time to cast off,
The cloth that has got,
Dark patches of smoke.
The time has come,
To throw the last one in my hand,
Far away, on the NO MAN'S LAND!!

MY MOTHER

She was an'impecciable' piece,
A lady who knew to protect.
Keeping herself away from,
The slander she could get.
She did walk,
But left no footprints.
For the people to blame her,
For the path she took.
She did cry,
But not infront of the world.
Bcz she knew the 'hideous minds',
Waiting all around,
To make her life more pathetic,
By snatching the only little joy she was left with.
She did get weak,
Loosing all the strength she had.
But she never let anyone know or feel,
What she was going through!
Her determination increased,
With her every move.
She did try to know the world,
Not bcz she wanted,
But bcz she needed.
It was unfathomable for her,
Sometimes she was disappointed,
Sometimes felt isolated.
She slogged her guts out but didnt give up,
And finally she was left with satisfaction.
Satisfaction of knowing the world!
She did laugh,
Holding the pain she had,
She did it,
To prove those people,
Who were throwing  'a wicked smile',
Looking at her with a rapacious eyes.
That she was not the lady,
Waiting for their sympathy.
I know (even today) she is gutted deep inside,
For the life she had to face,
For the pains and troubles,
That was more than enough,
To make her cold and numb.
By crushing her desire,
And breaking her aim.
But she was the one,
Who accepted it.
Without any question,without any objection!!